Accepting Changes

The past year and a half has been a season of adjustment. Life after college is so different and God has done the unexpected in my life. I had thought I knew where God was going to take me in my life and what He was going to have me do, but those were ultimately my plans. So of course my plans did not align with God's great plans for me. I never thought I'd be teaching while enjoying it and thriving! God has totally provided for my every need over the past year and a half! I am so blessed in many ways and am very thankful for ALL of the new friends and coworkers that he's placed in my life. They're such a blessing to have!

Last month, when I turned 23, I realized that the past year was a "transitioning" year for me. It was a big transition to come home after being away at college for the past 4 years. It was weird living at home again, not having friends around 24/7, and maintaining friendships across the ocean. I guess you can say, that it made me realize who were really my close friends. I love how many different ways of communicating exist, yet for some people, it is a challenge to keep in touch. I think it really depends on how much the friendship means to both sides.

The great blessing has been having new friends in my life and of course continuing to develop the friendships that I made in college. It was so nice having 3 shades come and visit me! We had a blast and I loved having them here in my "world"! So overall, it has been a tough and exciting time of transitioning, but I have learned to accept the changes that have happened and I am looking forward to what else God has in store for me :)

Who I wanna be

I started reading a new book and was reminded that Jesus Christ needs to be the love of my life, the Prince Charming, my groom...this song is who I want to be when others see me...

She's In Love by According to John

What a beautiful smile
A radiant girl
Fell in love first time I saw her
She stays on my mind
I’d give anything
To know everything about her

Pre-Chorus:
There’s light in her eyes
And I know it’s all for him
She carries on and on
Like he was her best friend

Chorus:
She’s in love (echo)
It’s not hard to see
But I would like to believe it was with me
Someone got a hold of her heart
And he won’t let go
And I know
She’s in love

Verse2:
She looks to the sky
When she talks about him
She believes he hung the moon
Said he had to go away
She waits for his return
Says he’s coming for her soon

Pre-Chorus2:
How can this be fair?
This guy can walk on water
Don’t guess I’ve got a prayer
He’s written love letters - to reach her

Bridge:
She worships the ground he walks on
She just smiles when she says his name
It’s a match made in heaven
I can’t compete with the King of Kings 

A New Year..

Wow! I didn't realize I haven't posted a blog in the New Year! This year is already going by so fast. I was so excited because of my trip to Oregon, which was SO MUCH FUN! I think that it was possibly the best trip I've ever been on, and really did NOT want to leave.

Well, let's go back in time to the beginning of this year. It started off in Cali w/ the Rose Bowl Parade, partying with my family, Disneyland, more family time and lots of good food. And of course, ozoni -- mochi good luck soup!


So the best part about this year so far was going to Oregon and seeing my wonderful amazing friends that I miss with all my heart! I got to hang out with Jodi & go shopping, spend time with my roomie, and of course spend time with Three Shades! The Sisterhood was reunited and it felt oh so good! Good memories for sure that I will cherish! I can't wait til our next reunion! I'm so so blessed with such great, meaningful and deep friendships with these women of the Lord. All of them!

♥

Give Thanks

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays and last night exemplified the reasons why I love thanksgiving so much. The top on my list of what I'm thankful for is that I get to be home for thanksgiving with my family. We usually have thanksgiving dinner on Wednesday night with our immediate family. It was a blast spending time with my family---listening to my Grandpa's childhood stories, my cousin talking nonstop, questions about these "high school relationships" that they are going through, and of course eating 'ono licious food! I was gonna take a picture of it, but decided not to.

So I decided to try and make the green bean casserole that I grew to love on the mainland. It turned out pretty good! :) The stuffing was yummy, my Mom's rolls, and my Aunty's pumpkin crunch squares were scrumptious!

Here's my mini list of what I'm thankful for...
*God's blessings despite my feelings of unworthiness
*Being home for thanksgiving this year
*Having a job--my own classroom!
*Getting paid for teaching!
*my friends--even though some are far away
*music--can't live without it
*and of course my family!

Colossians 3:15Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. 16Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. 17And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Happy Thanksgiving!

scrapbooking

So I've been learning the art and craft of scrapbooking...I have so many pictures and my current "album in process" is my Juniors Abroad album. I started it and have yet to finish it... I think I finished my Amsterdam pictures, but need to move on to Belgium, and Paris!! Tomorrow I plan on showing my class pictures from my trip...and of course looking for symmetry in different land marks...such as the "Eiffel Tower".

Anyway, I thought I'd post up some pictures from the only album that I finished titled "Three Shades." It is basically the love, life and friendship of what started out as a flute trio. Rachael, of course thought we needed a group name and chose "three shades." For some reason we meant to pick something better but of course that never happened, thus making us "three shades" for life. :) We are also the "Sisterhood of the traveling sweatpants." I know it's so cheesy, but we love it! It makes it so much easier and consistent to keep in touch with each other, with me being an ocean away from them.

I still really want to travel to Japan someday. And I want to go back to Europe--Belgium & Paris, especially! And Italy, Germany, etc etc. Someday...:) And New York too!

Fall

Today has been a rainy day and it makes me miss Oregon and the rain that I always hated. Its funny how you miss the things that you once hated. weird. I have been missing the fall weather, fall leaves and all of the fun stuff that come with the season. I love living in "paradise" but I miss the change of scenery, the change in weather and the beauty of the seasons.

I got to help out with the college fair to talk to high school students about Fox. It brought back all of the memories of college--roommates, the SEASONS, classes, studying, laptop!, and everything that comes with the package of going to Fox. I wouldn't trade it for anything. Talking to these Hawaii kids was fun because I could relate to them, having grown up here in hawaii. I kept on advertising the beautiful fall season and experiencing the cold :)

I even talked to my students about Fall and of course added the reasons why the leaves change colors and that they eventually fall. Many of them have traveled being in the military, so they have experienced it. The ones that have never left Hawaii, it gave them a chance to see the REAL leaves from Oregon and to hear us talk about it! Thanks Rachael for sending those! They were very excited!!

I can't wait to go up to Oregon in January! It's getting closer! I don't know how much I'll like the cold again though...i'm gonna freeze! hehe. I can't wait to spend time with my friends again!!

Anyways, back to the rainy day today....all I did was pretty much relax, lay around and watch TV and of course sleep off and on. I love weekends! Thank the Lord the weather is getting cooler. It makes it easier to sleep, but then harder to get out of bed.

another year...

Gosh, I can't believe I'm another year older...I'm 22! I feel like I just turned 21. It's so strange. I can no longer say that I'm 21.

I feel so old although everyone says that I'm so young. Teaching makes me feel really old and I'm sure my students think I'm old too. haha. I love teaching, despite the craziness and stressfulness. I love my students! They are so much fun. They made me little presents, sang happy birthday to me, and bought me some gifts. It was so cute and precious :) I believe these are the moments of satisfaction as a teacher..when your students show you that they care too.

Even though I was a little sad about not being able to celebrate my birthday with my friends, my kids and family made it special..and oh, so did the other teachers! :) I felt special today! This getting older business still can be fun...hehe.

So I was thinking today, that my goal this year should be and is going to be to find true contentment in Christ. Not just to say it, but to apply it to my life. I am so blessed beyond measure, literally. Great class, great school, great coworkers, great family, great friends (despite the fact that they are many miles away). May I learn to thank God always for what he's blessed me with daily. And may I dwell on the blessings and not the things I want, and may I continually deepen my walk with the lover of my soul. I'm fixing my eyes solely on Him, the author and perfecter of my faith. May I trust with all my heart, soul and mind that He has his hand and best interest in mind for me and that everything will come in His timing. :)

Whose plans...?

So after just deciding to be patient, wait and see what happens, I get a call for an interview for a teaching position. The call just so happened to come at a somewhat inconvenient time. I was on my way to Bellows for our annual family camp. Despite having some hesitations about accepting the interview, I agreed and decided to just see what happens. So after an AMAZING time with my family at camp, I was completely exhausted and had to prepare for my interview. As I prepared and prayed about it, I kept thinking that it would just be a practice interview and that I would substitute for this coming school year. That way I can go to Oregon & visit, and decide what to do. I thought I had that all figured out and I was totally fine with "my" plan.

My interview went well and I asked questions and talked about my experiences, and still felt that I probably wouldn't get the job because other people were interviewed besides me. I also admit that I knew I would have to work really hard, and of course that meant that I can't be so lazy anymore. So I was being a little bit selfish.. I wasn't expecting to hear back until today or tomorrow. But I got a call back yesterday with an offer for a 3rd grade position. I was very surprised and excited and apprehensive. So I decided to pray about it over night and make my final decision in the morning. At first, I was thinking that I had to accept it because it's an amazing opportunity, the school seems great, but then I would start REALLY soon, and I wouldn't have much time to prepare..

So as I prayed, talked with my family & friends about it I knew what the right decision was. But I still was uncertain because of my selfishness (again). I really was set on substituting, and I knew that time was crunching down before the school year began. But somehow in the back of my mind, I just had a feeling that I was going to get an offer and have a job. And guess what? I read the daily devotional by the Purpose Driven Life, and it said this:

• God is working in you, giving you the desire to obey him and the power to do what pleases him. Philippians 2:13 (NLT)

Now that to me was a very clear indicator that God was going to take care of the details if I choose to obey Him and accept the job offer. God's timing is always perfect, yet it never seems perfect to me. He taught me that His blessings come when I least expect it and sometimes when it seems inconvenient for me. I am thrilled and blessed about this opportunity. I have LOTS to do, lots to learn...but I know that my God will be with me every step of the way. And, I even have a supportive family, friends, and mentors who have been through this experience themselves.

So I'm stepping out in faith, having full confidence that this school year will be full of joy, challenges, growth, and accomplishments. I didn't expect this at all, but I know that I'm not in this alone. I'm willing to take this leap and see where it leads...:)

Standing firm

Summer school is going pretty good so far. I didn't know how exhausting it is for such a short amount of time-4 hours. It's a good amount of time though and nice so the kids can have fun too in the summer time. Having 31 kids is huge and noisy and stressful. I love teaching, no doubt, but managing them is the toughest part. Everyone that I've talked to keeps telling me that I HAVE to "put my foot down"/lay down the law, be tough and stand firm. My response is always that it's really not in my nature to be "mean/firm." I'm practicing it and it's good that I have this summer school experience to learn and practice being firm.

It's just exhausting and takes so much of my energy. My prayer is that I seek God's guidance in everything, especially through the last weeks.

Other than school, I miss my friends. It's not the same living apart from them, and talking over the phone doesn't even compare to being with each other in person. I miss the fun, crazy times with the roommates, three shades, and my other loves! Maybe I will move back...:P

I'm waiting for God's call on my life. I know He has great things in store for me, so I guess you could say i'm in the time of waiting and listening for His voice and direction.

♥LoVe.iS.heRe♥

I keep on hearing this song on the radio and it always reminds me that God is always present and that he never stops loving us. I wonder why I forget that so often, especially when I don't feel or see God in my life. I know that he's with me, but maybe i need to acknowledge his presence.

I am confused about life--what to do, where to go/live, looking back over the past 4 years of college, missing friends & wondering if and when I'll have those moments again... So many thoughts flood my head and heart. I feel such a heavy burden and I can't put a specific name on it because I know it's many of these things that are weighing on me. Now that college is over I have a degree that pretty much tells me what I'll be doing for the rest of my life. But do I want to get right into it right away? Or do I want to explore and take leaps of faith to serve the God who has carried and blessed me more than I ever imagined?
...so many questions, without answers...

I don't feel any specific call on my life right now. Maybe it's because I'm not searching God's will and in prayer about it. I guess I'm being lazy and that's why I don't feel that tug on my heart.

It's so weird to realize that I'm not going back to Fox. That I'm not just home for the summer. It's really weird and sad because I won't be apart of the Fox life....but I have so many memories of all the experiences and things I've learned. Leaving college & living in the real world is harder than i thought... But I know that whatever I do & wherever I go someone is always going to be with me, carrying me, comforting me and ♥loving me. :)

Tenth Avenue North - Love Is Here
Come to the waters
You who thirst and you’ll thirst no more
Come to the Father
You who work and you’ll work no more

All you who labor in vain
And to the broken and shamed

Love is here
Love is now
Love is pouring from His hands from His brow
Love is near it satisfies
Streams of mercy flowing from His side
Cause Love is here

Come to the treasure
You who search and you’ll search no more
Come to the lover
You who want and you’ll want no more

All you who labor in vain
And to the broken and shamed

And to the bruised and fallen
Captives bound and brokenhearted
He is the Lord, He is the Lord
By His stripes He’s paid our ransom
From His wounds we drink salvation
He is the Lord, He is the Lord

Love is here
Love is now
Love is pouring from His hands from His brow
Love is near it satisfies
Streams of mercy flowing from His side